Friday, April 25, 2008

I'm 30! I'm A Man!


Today's my birthday. I am 30 now and have decided that I would take it upon myself to bestow unto you some words of wisdom. Take them to heart.


"Take one step at a time, because if you don't you'll be like hopping around and people get real tired that way"

"Never eat fruit off a rhino's horn because it is dangerous and disgusting"

"Marry for money and not for love because love farts in bed and changes the channel in the bottom of the 9th"

"It is pointless to leave a trail of breadcrumbs because what happens if you get to where you're going and then you're hungry. You end up having to follow those breadcrumbs all the way back and then you're back where you started. You should've just stayed there, eaten the bread and saved everyone a whole lot of time."

"I feel that no one should really go anywhere without a little confetti."

"Ducks love Sun Chips"

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