I gotta do something to counterbalance all the sugary-sweetness going on around here these days...
I'd think the real torture would be for the person cleaning up after all this mess
Showing posts with label torture. Show all posts
Showing posts with label torture. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Our Adorable Lil' Nursery
We spent all weekend working so hard to set up the baby's room. It turned out really well, and while the theme we chose is not everyone's cup of tea, we love it and can't wait to bring a little bundle of joy home to her beautiful new room, designed especially for her.
First we put a fresh coat of paint on the room, only about halfway up the wall tho to keep that textured brick & aged patchy look on the ceiling that we know baby will love to gaze at every night. Before we started moving in any furniture we made sure the window bars, ceiling rings and the trap door were nice a tightly secured. Don't want baby to hurt herself.
The crib! So tough to find the perfect one. Since that's where the baby will be spending so much of her time, we want to make sure she is beyond comfy. We decided to forgo the sidebars because we think it's such overkill. We don't wanna baby the baby too much. The sooner she learns how hard the floor is, the better, hence the yellow & white checker tile we installed.
A mobile to hang above baby's crib is also important. It's got to be a vision of peace and serenity, allowing the baby to be lulled off to sleep just by watching it dangle there in its iron & chain majesty. The dusty cobwebs were my personal touch, I thought the room could really use some more grey & filth.
A changing table is an obvious must for any baby's room and we went with this simple fourlegged workbench (changing a diaper is work) mainly because the store had a special sale, as it came with a free chain to hold the baby down while you work and a hammer to get at those really nasty turds. We hung the safety Tyvek suits we'll need to wear while changing diapers conveniently on the wall next to the table. And those shackles back there? Don't worry. They're not for the baby, per se.
No nursery is complete without a rocking chair for mom & dad. This little number just screams out "Sit on me and sing your baby a lullaby!", doesn't it? Yes those spikes look more than cozy but the real clincher was how it came with the safety lap plank and wrist restraints. We haven't figured out the ankle bars yet, but maybe once baby comes it'll all be made clear.
So.... Baby's room is done, and we are as ready as anyone could be. We're still looking for some sort of toy chest so let us know if you see anything that'd fit in our adorable lil' nursery.
First we put a fresh coat of paint on the room, only about halfway up the wall tho to keep that textured brick & aged patchy look on the ceiling that we know baby will love to gaze at every night. Before we started moving in any furniture we made sure the window bars, ceiling rings and the trap door were nice a tightly secured. Don't want baby to hurt herself.
The crib! So tough to find the perfect one. Since that's where the baby will be spending so much of her time, we want to make sure she is beyond comfy. We decided to forgo the sidebars because we think it's such overkill. We don't wanna baby the baby too much. The sooner she learns how hard the floor is, the better, hence the yellow & white checker tile we installed.
A mobile to hang above baby's crib is also important. It's got to be a vision of peace and serenity, allowing the baby to be lulled off to sleep just by watching it dangle there in its iron & chain majesty. The dusty cobwebs were my personal touch, I thought the room could really use some more grey & filth.
A changing table is an obvious must for any baby's room and we went with this simple fourlegged workbench (changing a diaper is work) mainly because the store had a special sale, as it came with a free chain to hold the baby down while you work and a hammer to get at those really nasty turds. We hung the safety Tyvek suits we'll need to wear while changing diapers conveniently on the wall next to the table. And those shackles back there? Don't worry. They're not for the baby, per se.
No nursery is complete without a rocking chair for mom & dad. This little number just screams out "Sit on me and sing your baby a lullaby!", doesn't it? Yes those spikes look more than cozy but the real clincher was how it came with the safety lap plank and wrist restraints. We haven't figured out the ankle bars yet, but maybe once baby comes it'll all be made clear.
So.... Baby's room is done, and we are as ready as anyone could be. We're still looking for some sort of toy chest so let us know if you see anything that'd fit in our adorable lil' nursery.
Monday, March 15, 2010
God Bring Me Deaf
Ok. So I've joined the workforce and I'm lucky enough to work in a place that likes to blast the tunes all day long. Music is motivation. I love all the 80's mixes and the Tom Petty and Beatles (early Beatles mind you). I don't even mind the better Aerosmith stuff, but from there it gets ugly. Horrible "modern rock" and painfully cliché country muck doesn't even scratch the surface. The scourge of decent music everywhere, Nickelback galore makes no apologies, nor does the Backstreet/N'Sync ballads, the old school Metallica, and a country pop remake of Mockingbird that is the audio equivalent of letting loose in a room full of beagle puppies with an M60. Is nothing sacred?I expressed my concerns to my fellow employee who seems deemed to pick and choose the potentially deadly playlist. I call her DJ Mixmaster Melissa. She said she would love some recommendations. So we sat down on a 15 and went thru a few things. It did not go well, and maybe I started off too far down the road from what was comfortable for her, but extreme times....
I played a favorite tune from Battles, Tij, since she expressed enjoyment in drum tracks, I thought this may be a safe bet. She countered with this...
It took every ounce of my being to not stab myself in the ears with the plastic forks. I took it down a notch and knowing she was a fan of sappy ballads I played her some of the gentle brilliance of the Grizzly Bear.
She replied with...
"I have Johnny B. Goode!"Game over.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
You Are What You Read
This is kind of a sad story so if you don't like hearing of man's inhumanity towards God's lesser creatures you may wanna skip this one. I also want to foreword this with that I do not agree with the acts of Guillermo Vargas and do not agree with his ways of expressing his thoughts towards society, but I can't deny my interest in the point he is trying to make.
Guillermo Habacuc Vargas is a Costa Rican artist, or some would call "artist". His most recent and most controversial exhibit entitled "Eres lo que lees", is really quite simple. He retained some local children to scour the streets and find a homeless, sick and dying dog. Not that difficult a task as there are thousands in Costa Rica. He then ties the dog to the wall in a gallery and leaves it there to die as onlookers & art appreciators spend the day walking by within inches of Natividad, the name given to the dog by Vargas (Spanish for "birth").
Right off the bat this seems like cruel and unusual punishment (did I mention Spanish phrases are written on the wall around the dog in dog food?) and my attention was only brought to the issue because I was asked to sign a petition to help stop Vargas from repeating the display with other dogs. Vargas, a dog owner himself, responds to all the uproar & boycott over his "works" by simply saying that this is a study in reflection of human nature. That the people of Costa Rica see these homeless & sick dogs everyday and don't blink an eye. They don't try and help them or feed them or bring them into their homes and are usually genuinely disgusted by and outwardly brutal towards them. These dogs die everyday in dark alleys and garbage dumps and get ignored, yet the second someone takes one of these dogs and places them in front of the world for everyone to see them die, then people take offense and start petitions & protests. As an artist he has made his statement. As long as the world doesn't see the ugly, the death, as long as it's not at our front door, we're okay with it. I mean, I know I was never asked to sign a petition about helping the sick dogs living on the streets. Just the ones that we are forced to watch die. So who is the petition trying to protect? Our fragile psyche or the dogs?
Guillermo Habacuc Vargas is a Costa Rican artist, or some would call "artist". His most recent and most controversial exhibit entitled "Eres lo que lees", is really quite simple. He retained some local children to scour the streets and find a homeless, sick and dying dog. Not that difficult a task as there are thousands in Costa Rica. He then ties the dog to the wall in a gallery and leaves it there to die as onlookers & art appreciators spend the day walking by within inches of Natividad, the name given to the dog by Vargas (Spanish for "birth"). 
Right off the bat this seems like cruel and unusual punishment (did I mention Spanish phrases are written on the wall around the dog in dog food?) and my attention was only brought to the issue because I was asked to sign a petition to help stop Vargas from repeating the display with other dogs. Vargas, a dog owner himself, responds to all the uproar & boycott over his "works" by simply saying that this is a study in reflection of human nature. That the people of Costa Rica see these homeless & sick dogs everyday and don't blink an eye. They don't try and help them or feed them or bring them into their homes and are usually genuinely disgusted by and outwardly brutal towards them. These dogs die everyday in dark alleys and garbage dumps and get ignored, yet the second someone takes one of these dogs and places them in front of the world for everyone to see them die, then people take offense and start petitions & protests. As an artist he has made his statement. As long as the world doesn't see the ugly, the death, as long as it's not at our front door, we're okay with it. I mean, I know I was never asked to sign a petition about helping the sick dogs living on the streets. Just the ones that we are forced to watch die. So who is the petition trying to protect? Our fragile psyche or the dogs?
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