New Pool To Poop In

Highway Fertilizing

Yuula pooped in a cornfield on the way down to Lancaster

4 Seconds A Day: March 2013

I may have squeezed an extra day in there

Do You Overlook The Importance Of A Toilet?

Our recent water flow issue has really given us perspective into appreciating our indoor plumbing, something we normally take completely for granted. I will forever smile when I hear the flush of a sweet toilet, burn my hands while doing the dishes or suffer a house-rattling overload of the washing machine. Oh and those hot showers ain't bad either...

yes, even the poop

Flushing Money Down The Toilet

there are 8 days until Christmas

gold glitter pills that you ingest, digest, and expel

have the prettiest, most expensive turds at the party this new year

Kick Us Off, February

Things like this separate the everydays from the anyday-nows

And before you get too excited, that's not Yuula's...

Pooped In Public

Yuula tried to tye-dye.

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Cosby Said It Would Happen

Relatively uneventful day. Yuula had a checkup this morning. Height and weight levelled off a touch. Still a melon head tho. And two shots today. The nurse stuck her renegade style. Yuula didn't even have a chance to cry. Maybe just one tear. Then I spent the rest of the day staring at a computer screen and deleting lines at 1/16 inch intervals. I may have gone blind. I guess the most interesting development has to do with crap. I call it that now, instead of calling it poop, because Yuula has reached that point I was warned about so many years ago by Bill Cosby. Her poop stinks. Therefore, it's crap.

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Kind Of Very Nothing

One of those days, I don't really remember anything. Anything significant anyhow. I know I watched Fight Club, and ate some hot tamales, and watched some !!! videos with Yuula, and Elvis Costello. She likes Elvis Costello. More confused by !!!. I remember something about a horse named Zenyatta and how her heart beats 24 times a minute and can cross a football field in 11 strides. Pretty neat. I went on a poop chase and talked with my wife at length about some life altering decisions in the upcoming months. I had a tuna sandwich, too.

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We Make Us Sick

Whoa! What happened? I'll tell ya what happened. Laura had a baby is what happened.



Everything's been a fog since then. Something about having a baby makes your brain turn into tapioca. And not like good cassava tapioca. It becomes diner tapioca. Jersey diner tapioca. Yeah. Bad.



The past week has been a blur and a flash at the same time. Laura and I talk about it each night, trying to remember bits a pieces of the night she gave birth, the ride to the hospital, the day in the hospital, the day she came home, and little details keep resurfacing. We wish we had videotaped the whole thing, tho we know we'd never watch it. It wouldn't do it justice.



Yuula is home and she's doing great. She's met both sets of grandparents, a couple aunts and an uncle, some neighbors and even a good old friend. She's given lots of blood, she's recycled, she's sunbathed, she's battled jaundice ... she's had a busy first week of life.



Last week was strange. I had to teach RxHS camp, and I felt bad for leaving but knew I had to. Then Friday came and I had to call out of work. I couldn't take another day to not spend with her. We did a lot of cuddling, and lot of sleeping, and a little pooping. She's awesome at that. You should see. And this week I've returned to work. That feels weird. Will probably get easier but... do I want it to?



Laura's been fine. Like she never passed a baby thru her body. She's my hero now. I was there, but that doesn't mean I know how she did it. She walked funny for a day but other than that she's been calm in the face of hysteria and nurturing in the face of frustration. And maybe the most impressive is how she's managed to be awake when the baby needs her to be. I thought for sure I was gonna be like a single dad with Rip Van Winkle catching z's in the corner all day. This has not been the case. Except for right now...



Maybe most surprising is Yuula herself. You can never know what your child is going to be like but man, she is incredible. She has been so reserved and gentle but needy and direct. She can go from zero to 60 and then 120 to zero. She's strong as a bull. Everyday her eyes open more and she gets fatter. She now has three chins and six thighs. And she's hilarious. She makes us laugh, even with the semi-lack of a real personality. We're in trouble once she starts coming around. We're starting to be able to read her cries, Laura is really good at it. My favorite is the grunting when she poops. Never has a poop been so cute. I got photos, don't worry. Each day we learn something new about her. Hopefully that never ends.



While I have been in a trance and tired and anxious and nervous for ten days, today I feel like I am getting back on a track. Some track. I've collected some decent sleep the past day or so and I'm settling into my new role. I don't think I'm making as easy a transition as Laura did. She was born to do this. But I'm learning. I've got a groove going on with the diaper thing. Taking charge there. I know her favorite positions and have a 87% success rate while trying to soothe a crying Yuula. And I finally got that dresser built after a weekend of knowing it was up there but somehow forgetting how to get upstairs. The nursery is almost done. Only a week late.



So here's a warning: This blog is about to take a drastic change, a shift in subject matter, and if this past week is any indication, a decrease in frequency. So if you're one of those people who think that being overly obsessed with your child is strange and parents need to get a life then maybe you wanna check out another blog. Because we think that. Those people make us sick. But now we understand, and we make us sick.